Hey there, you wanna hear some Latvian potato jokes? I got a whole bunch of ’em, they are funny. Them city folks, they don’t get it. But us, we know potatoes. We live and breathe potatoes. So, let’s get to it, these jokes, they’re about as good as a fresh potato pie on a cold day.
Why Latvians love potatoes? ‘Cause they’re all we got! Just kidding, kinda. Potatoes are important, you see. They feed us, keep us warm, make funny jokes.
Here’s one: Latvian man, he go to doctor. Doctor say, “You sick, need medicine.” Man say, “How much?” Doctor say, “Ten potatoes.” Latvian man, he faint! Ten potatoes? That’s a fortune!
Here is another one, this one is good. Two Latvian men, they talkin’. One say, “My wife, she make best potato soup.” Other man say, “Oh yeah? My wife, she make soup with one potato, feed whole family!” They both laugh, ’cause it’s true, kinda. We know how to make a little go a long way.
One more joke about latvian potato. The latvian man went to doctor and told him “Doctor, I have potato stuck in my ear!”. The doctor said “Well, the potato is too big for your ear”. The latvian man reply “Well, that is the problem, the potato in my ear is too small!”.
The Latvian potato jokes are popular. You know why? ‘Cause they’re about life, our life. We laugh ’cause it’s funny, and it’s true. We work hard, we love potatoes, and we know how to laugh. That’s what matters.
- Latvian man, he win lottery.
- He buy all the potatoes.
- He so happy.
- Then he realize, he can’t eat them all.
- He sad now.
That’s a good one, right? It is funny. ‘Cause it is about potato and it is about latvian, so it is latvian potato jokes.
You know, back in the day, we didn’t have much. But we had potatoes. We ate them boiled, mashed, fried. We even made vodka from them! Potatoes, they saved us. That’s why we joke about them. It’s our way of sayin’ thanks.
Another joke here. A Latvian man is walking down the street and he sees another Latvian man with a big bag of potatoes. He says, “Hey, where did you get all those potatoes?” The other man says, “I stole them from a farmer.” The first man says, “You stole them? That’s terrible!” The other man says, “Yeah, but I needed them. I have a family to feed.” The first man says, “Well, I guess you did what you had to do. But next time, try to ask for them first.” The other man says, “Ask for them? Are you crazy? If I asked for them, he would have said no!”
We got jokes about Estonians too. They’re our neighbors, you see. We like to tease them. We say they’re slow, like a snail eating a potato. But it’s all in good fun. We love them really, just don’t tell them I said that.
Here’s one about an Estonian. Estonian man, he try to plant potato. He dig and dig, but no potato grow. He ask Latvian man, “Why my potato no grow?” Latvian man say, “You plant it upside down, you silly goose!”
Latvian jokes are like potato, there are many kinds of it. And I will tell you more about it.
- A Latvian man is walking down the street when he sees a sign that says “Talking Dog for Sale.”
- He goes inside and asks the owner about the dog.
- The owner says, “This dog is amazing. He can talk, he can sing, he can even do your taxes.”
- The Latvian man is skeptical, but he decides to give it a try.
- He asks the dog, “What’s two plus two?”
- The dog says, “Four.”
- The Latvian man is impressed. He asks the dog, “What’s the capital of France?”
- The dog says, “Paris.”
- The Latvian man is amazed. He asks the dog, “Who’s the greatest basketball player of all time?”
- The dog says, “Michael Jordan.”
- The Latvian man is sold. He buys the dog and takes him home.
- The next day, the Latvian man’s friend comes over.
- The friend sees the dog and asks, “What’s so special about this dog?”
- The Latvian man says, “This dog is amazing. He can talk, he can sing, he can even do your taxes.”
- The friend is skeptical, but he decides to give it a try.
- He asks the dog, “What’s two plus two?”
- The dog says, “Woof.”
- The friend is disappointed. He says, “I thought you said this dog could talk.”
- The Latvian man says, “He can. He just doesn’t like you.”
See? We got jokes about everything. Life, love, potatoes. It’s all here. And it’s all funny, if you know how to see it. We Latvians, we know how to see it. We been through a lot, but we still laugh. That’s our secret. Well, that and a good potato soup.
These Latvian potato jokes, they are good. If you want to hear more, you come back, ok? I got plenty more where these came from. And maybe I’ll even share some of my potato soup with you. It’s the best in the village, you know. Everyone say so.
